Well, I have finally taken the last step and written a dear John email to Jeff. So now all my affairs are officially over.
I have been trying to take this last step for weeks now and I couldn't do it. I didn't want to face his anger, I didn't want to burn my boats, there were several reasons I guess. But whilst I was away these last few days with my husband I realised that what we have is basically good, and to risk it just for sex is stupid. And with Jeff it is just sex, it will never be more. We had nothing in common, even language, he understands not one word of English, and that had caused several misunderstandings between us. So it is over now, and I think he expects it, so won't be too angry. He has been texting me daily, wanting to know what happened in Spain, what I am thinking, and now he knows.
He will move on, cos basically what he has with his wife is also good, he just wanted a bit of spice. And, as a result of our mini-affair, he has now opened his very own "seitensprungoasis" a room one can rent for 6 hours to meet one's lover. He got the idea from the rooms we rented, and as he is self-employed, he has now added a room to his business empire in cooperation with his business partner. What I find amazing is that his wife hasn't asked him how he came by the idea, and has helped him decorate and set up the room!
If it had been the other way around, I think I might have asked my husband where the idea suddenly came from, as it is totally unrelated to his current business.
Maybe sometimes things are best left unsaid, and his wife knows that.