I stole this new year wish list from the Kevinwilson, who had, not surprisingly stolen it from someone else.

1. The word(s) I would most like to disappear from people’s vocabulary: Not possible

2. The interests that I would most like to learn how to do properly:Ski

3. The soap opera I would most like to have a Christmas Day 2008 show in which all the cast, the set, the scriptwriters and anyone else responsible for the programme meet a tragic and permanent show-stopping end: all reality shows

4. The people (other than family, and if they were still alive!) that I would most like to spend 24 hours stuck in a traffic jam or airport next Christmas: Tom Hanks and George Clooney

5. The celebrity that I would most like to take early retirement by next Christmas: Paris Hilton

6. The business I would least like to go into insolvency: The company I work for

7. The country that I would most like to visit in 2008: Israel (cos Mark is there)

8. The city break I would most like to take in 2008: Vienna or Berlin

9. The new experience that I would most like to sample in 2008: Winning the lotteryD

10. The TV programme I would like to see more of: Friends or Sex in the City or Coupling

11. The one thing that would make my life less stressful: not having to lie

12. The person with whom I would like to spend the most time in 2008: Rolf

it seems that I am to thank for sula starting a good news blog
http://goodnewsblog.blog.co.uk

I take a humble bow, and hope she can find enough good news for each day.

her story today is about a giant kissing event in Venice. Not kissing giants, just lots of people kissing each other. Sounds my sort of event

I have just had a wonderful afternoon in the nest with R.
I arrived there after a morning in the office, half an hour ahead of him.

I put on my little Santa outfit, and lay on the bed tied with the gold ribbon for him to find. it looked great, but no photos, I forgot to take my camera with me.

Lots and lots of great sex followed, as well as good interesting conversation,
He did give me a Christmas gift too, which is an expensive looking pure cashmere sweater, which I am wearing as I type. It is so soft and luxurious. I love it.

And then we had a gorgeous meal in the town, before catching our respective trains home. I was grinning like a loon when i changed trains I reckon. So happy.

See him again in a fortnight for an overnight. This lovenest is definitely proving its worth
and now I will sleep the sleep of the well f**D

here you go ladies, check this out

A friend of mine was complaining to me that her husband always buys her a household appliance, so this year she has bought him one " as he likes bloody household appliances so much"

what my hubby bought does not even feature in the list. Some bath oil from Body shop, some body lotion from the same place, and a couple of books, one of which seems to be related to returning to nature. Not sure what this says about our relationship

Not an original title I know
But I wish you all a great day. I hope Steve has not overdone it on the booze and fags, and that those of you will not so ideal family lives survive today intact.
My lot are still fast asleep, gone are the days of little kids bouncing on the bed at 6am to open presents. Probably won't see them until Lunchtime now. So I have been reading posts, and redesigning ever so slightly my blog.
Yesterday I popped into town and bought myself a sexy santa outfit and 8 metres of gold ribbon. I am seeing R on Thursday, for the whole afternoon at the nest. He wanted me wrapped in red paper with a gold ribbon. So, as wrapping myself in paper will be too much of a challenge, I am going to put on the santa outfit, with stockings and heels etc, and then tie the gold ribbon strategically around me and lie on the bed to wait for his arrival. He is giving me a 30 minute head start to do this
The thought of it is enough to turn me on. And yesterday when I was buying the outfit i was totally aroused, and there were lots of naughty text messages whizzing between us.
My husband had as usual, and typically, left my gift buying to 2 hours yesterday afternoon, and disappeared to the City. So that gave me the opportunity I needed, and it serves him right in a way.
So enjoy your day everybody, remember it is not just about the presents and overindulgence, lol-
Oh, and if you are very lucky, or unlucky, depending on your point of view, and if I can get a decent photo, I MIGHT post a friends only post of me in my Santa outfit on here.

Now I must admit to sending a Christmas newsletter at this time. For two reasons really, 1, it is easier and 2, at Easter would be too late. So, yes, I reckon that even a newsletter is better than no news at all.

We have one pair of acquantainces however, married, dual income, no kids (DINKS), who always send such a bragging letter.
Every month is detailed, where they went, what they bought, how many times they visited their damn second home, her new Mini cabriolet, his business trips etc etc. OMG! Am I jealous? Well maybe a little, but I also think that lives that revolve around what they have and where they have been are sad in a way. There is nothing REAL in this newsletter, and no one even signs it. It is written as a report by a 3rd person. It makes me want to throw up.
And then today another newsletter arrived. This couple are also DINKS, but unlike the first couple, they are real. They wrote of illness, and sadness, of triumphs and trials. Sure they mentioned holidays and business trips, work successes and the like, but they were mixed in with real life, as part of life, not as the only thing that was important.
The contrast between the 2 letters was striking, plus the second was signed and clearly written by one person, not in the 3rd person.
Should I tell the first couple that their letters strike the wrong note? maybe they do not realise how they come across. My husband of course blames the wife in the marriage. He reckons his mate the husband does not know what is in it. He could be right, but that is no excuse.

well, I am now off work until Thursday and it is a great feeling. The boss has made peace with me, he reckoned the not speaking to me was nothing to do with my blunt opinions, in fact he welcomes them Yeah right!

And the Sales director made peace with the boss as well. He didn't want to go on his Christmas break with the bad atmosphere unsorted.
Thing is, I think the boss should have been making peace with him. He is the boss after all, and needs to lead and manage his people.
I might keep that nugget to myself though, as he is actually talking to me again. It is nearly time for annual review after all.

So, while I am feeling mellow, and totally tired from too many late nights, I will wish you all Christmas greetings. Hope you enjoy the festivities however you do it.

Well the boss is still not talking to me, despite my apology yesterday.
I realise I made a big mistake, one of the big 6 from the book I reviewed on here

never correct a man. That is one of the big mistakes apparently, intimating they might have made a mistake, like suggesting they ask for directions, or read an instruction manual. These suggestions apparently suggest to the mans ears that we do not trust them not to mess it up. I think my boss took offence yesterday at my suggestion that he not mention the results, as it implied he was going to spoil the get-together

and today my husband proved the rebelling child theory again. Our train leaves the station at 7.47, the alarm rang at 6.47, I got up 10 minutes later, he didn't. At quarter past 7 I told him the time. Pardon, he says. I realised my mistake, mothering him. Nothing I said, only that is it 7.15. He buried himself under the covers without a word, and stayed there another 5 minutes!!!
One day he will miss that train, but damn him it was not todayD

Okay, normally I am sweet and giving - very giving, some might say
However today I really have had it with my boss.

He is behaving like a big kid, while complaining that others are being childish

he can't deal with stress, probably gets through 30 a day - cigarettes and cups of coffee ! Most of the year he has been moaning about the sales figures, and now, as the year end approaches it has reached fever pitch. The figures are pretty bad, we will not get bonuses. But we will survive, and will make a profit.

The sales director has of course been taking the blame all year. The atmosphere at meetings has been heated to say the least, poisonous emails have been whizzing around. We are now at the stage where our CEO and Sales Director communicate only by email, and their offices are next to each other

part of my job is HR. I have tried to calm this situation, but so far it has not worked.  The psychological pressure on the sales director is enormous, I know I would have cracked by now. It is tantamount to mobbing.
Tomorrow we should have a staff get together, a few drinks etc, nothing more. The Sales director, after a particularly acid email from the CEO, fired off a mail that he would not attend. He did not want to hear about how it was all his fault again, etc etc. I was copied, so i emailed the boss that it would be better if the get together was just social, no talk of results, everyone knows how bad they are.
He responds that he was not intending to mention results, he didn't know where I got the idea from.
Then he saw the Sales directors mail and told him he was being childish

then he said, maybe he wouldn't go either, if he was going to be like that ( now who is being childish

Then later, he said we should cancel it. I refused. This is so petty and stupid. Why should everyone suffer because these two don't get on?

then someone else said to me they were not looking forward to the get together as the CEO would go on about the results.  So I was not the only one who thought  he would then

The final mail of the day from the CEO was that he might not come, as he didn't like being told what he could and could not say, well dictated to was nearer the expression he used, and with the Sales director first saying he would not go, and then saying he would, he was really off the whole idea.
So who knows?

anyway, I did the female thing, and sent him a short apology with a note that I hoped he would attend.
But to be honest I don't really care if he does or not-

he leaves soon, so we can all breath a sigh of relief when that happens.

following my email from Andy, I found one tonight had come in from Res. He claims to be thinking of me every day, and he longs to meet, still, but is sooooooo busy apparently. And he would like to persuade me to a date, not just a coffee, but I am not going for that. He did ask about the nest as well. At one time, when he was looking for another lady friend, he suggested we share the nest!! Not sure R will agree to that one

I could get used to this
It certainly makes a change from dealing with my increasingly difficult boss

wow, I have just received an email from Andy, who I last saw at my daughters parents evening.
it reads:

liebe *

ich denke voll wärme an unsere begegnung zurück. ich habe sie sehr genossen, sie haben mich berührt und von zeit zu zeit nehme ich die erinnerung an dich in meinen kopf und freue mich daran. ich will dir nur dafür danken und dir wünschen, dass sich im 2008 all deine träume erfüllen werden. wer weiss, vielleicht kreuzen sich unsere wege wieder einmal!

liebe grüsse und ein ganz unschuldiges virtuelles küsschen von *

I am gobsmacked, yet also very touched. So long, barely a word, and now a really nice heartwarming email. I am not leaving R for him though, no matter how many times our paths might cross. I am very happy now with my current lover. But it is nice to stay on good terms with past lovers.

I have been reading a fascinating book called "Secrets about Men every Woman should Know" by Barbara de Angelis. I can recommend it to all you women, and maybe even some of the men to gain insight into what is happening with their women. Mind you I think she writes a smiliar book for Men to gain secrets about Women.
It is not a book that puts Men down, quite the opposite. It just shows how we think and act differently, and how Men interpret some of the things we say and do, not as we intended them to.
One amazing insight for me, which actually is totally obvious when you think about it, is that I tend to mother my husband. This is one of the 6 big mistakes women make.
Acting like a Mother is when I am overly helpful doing things for him that he should be doing himself, playing verbal guessing games trying to get information, assumming he will forget stuff so reminding him all the time of things he should remember himself, telling him off as if he is a child!, taking charge of activities that I assume he can't get right himself and correcting and directing him, even when I do it lovingly.
I am guilty of all that I realise, and have been for a long time, so he has slipped into being lazy and letting me mother him, but as well he needs to rebel like children do,and I see that, plus of course he doesn't want sex with me as I am too much like a mother and not enough like a lover to him, and from the other side I see him as someone who needs to much support and is not enough of a partner to me, so I don't want sex with him either.
This is a hugh revelation, and I am going to stop mothering him right now.
The other 5 of the top 6 mistakes are:
- Sacrificing who we are, and putting ourselves second to the man
- Falling in love with a mans potential (thinking we can rescue him etc)
- Covering up our excellence and competence - ( putting ourselves down, difficulty accepting compliments, not wanting to tell of our successes)
- Giving up our Power to Men - being a love martyr to keep the peace
- Acting like a little girl to get our way

I think I may have done most, but not all, of these things to some degree or other in the past, but I have stopped doing them a while ago as I fell out of love with my husband. And I have noticed that he seems to be a lot more loving to me since i stopped caring whether he loved me or not
I do think a lot of women commit all or most of the mistakes above, and then wonder why we have such problems in our relationships.
The book is great at telling us how we can remedy these problem areas. I am going to give it to my daughter, before she even gets in a relationship.
Thankfully I am not guilty of any of the top 20 sexual turnoffs.
And now I have read the book I intend to try and avoid making any of the big 6 mistakes with R as well.
I should have read it years ago, but maybe it wasn't written then
-

I have discovered a blog on here promoting a sex shop and his wares
http://sextoys.blog.co.uk/
He actually writes really interesting posts, I am now much wiser about a lot of things
Unfortunately the post on penis rings was just an ad, but following my last post on that, and the excellent advice I received, i have bought one locally for R. Well it is a sheath actually, which will give me extra feeling and filling !, so this is definitely a Christmas present that I am going to get probably more out of than him ; )
But if I am happy, then so is he.

The DVD I refered to in my retail therapy post - Henry and June
has arrived, which I think is another gift I am going to get lots out of   Just the thing for the love nest

On Sunday I am going to the love nest, to spend a night alone, as I have a business trip Monday, and the nest is nearer the airport. I am telling my husband that I am on my business trip until Wed - I am a very naughty girl: Really the business trip is one day, then I will stay again at the nest - alone unfortunately, go to work on Tuesday for the morning, have a massage in the afternoon, and then head back for the nest. This time I will not be alone as R is joining with me, all night

I might give him an early Christmas present as well-

Today it is M's birthday. He was my first lover, so this post is a birthday tribute to him

Happy birthday darling
I still think of you like that
I hope you have a great day, and I know you are where you want to be, and very happy there.
I am happy for you.

I thank you once again for all you taught me
I am glad we remain friends
I miss you still and probably always will
but I wouldn't change anything, except maybe the bit where you moved away

I thank you for your generosity in the past,
and your generosity now in being happy for me with my new lover

love
S

Although my husband is not a particularly tall guy, I have always thought he was well endowed.
Sometimes a bit too well endowed, as I can feel it ramming me inside!!!

so today I measured his penis in the non-erect state. 13cm's!!!

Just looked up the average and this is what it says:
"A non-erect penis usually measures between 8.5cm and 10.5cm (3-4 inches) from tip to base."

"The man whose non-erect penis is on the largish size will probably manage about a 75 per cent increase."

so let me see 13 * 1.75 = 22.75cms

"Even when aroused, a woman's vagina usually extends only to a length of about 10cm "
"The vagina has the most remarkable capacity for lengthening if something is introduced into it gradually.

So the exceptional man whose erect penis is eight inches long can still make love to any woman, providing he excites her properly and introduces his organ very slowly. If he does this, her vagina will lengthen by 150 or 200 per cent to accommodate him."

still sounds a bit tight to me, no wonder it can be damn uncomfortable sometimes, especially as he never excites me properly.

I must admit that none of my lovers have ever been so well endowed, but then I have decided that size does not matter, it is how you use it that counts

Today and yesterday I have been helping out at our Church Christmas bazaar.
Today, R showed up to surprise me.

it is a 240km round trip and we are already seeing each other on Monday,

and as I was helping out he did not know if I would be really busy. As it was, i wasn't, so could spend about an hour with him

and then he left again

It must be loveD

and that surprise visit is better than any present he could buy me.

Following my present dilemma earlier, I decided to cheer myself up checking out what sex shops there are near our love nest. I discovered there aren't any!!!
actually, thinking about it, I spotted one from the motorway, so I must have been searching under the wrong thing. That is the problem sometime trying to think up the correct German term for what I am looking for.

Anyway, instead I went on the site of a sex shop I had read about in the paper that is for women. They had a selection of DVD's, which I then checked out on amazon (where they were MUCH cheaper). So i ordered a porn DVD - my first ever! and I ordered a pearl string from this sex shop.
They will be delivered to a special postal box I have set up.
They will be a nice surprise for R, so he will get a gift after all, unless he wants to pay the bill, and then I will get a gift too
Thing is I am not sure if the pearl string is going to turn me on with the sensations, or turn him on. Advice welcome from any ladies out there who know.
And for him, the bow he mentioned reminded me of a penis ring. I know Geeforce wrote about them once, but it was a lot of German to plough through, so if any of you guys can tell me what the benefits of them are - in simple English, I will be very grateful

and if it embarrassing, then please send me a pm - although that is an option for friends only

My mascara is a little smudged this afternoon. I have been emailing with R about Christmas gifts. When we first started dating, I told him no gifts. This was because M had been so generous with gifts that I now find I can not look at any of them without becoming sentimental. So I reckoned no gifts, no reminders when it is all over - totally fatalistic of me, but it will be over one day.
The thing is that my husband is useless at buying me gifts, leaving it always to the last minute, putting no thought into it, or not bothering at all. So I got to thinking that actually I would quite like a Christmas Gift from R, just to see if he puts some thought into it, and what he gets me. A test if you like.
So I backtracked on the no gifts and told him I would quite like to exchange gifts for Christmas. But of course he is totally behind with everything at the moment, with his wife still being in the coma, and so totally stressed out with all he has to do and prepare for Christmas, which is anyway going to be weird for him this year.
So i was adding to his stress, and today I realised that and backtracked again. I told him, no worries, he didn't have to get me anything, we would just do something special together.
It isn't like i need a gift from him to prove he loves me, and it was unfair of me to expect him to do something because of the failings of my husband.
So we are agreed, yet I still find the tears are falling, and I really am not sure why, and I sure am not going to tell him.

Well Steve has one, so I have one too now.

I created myself a minor superhero on the site
http://www.ugo.com/channels/comics/heroMachine2/heromachine2.asp

it is a cool site, all for free, you can create a character, include colours and background, then printscreen it to word, copy into a photo processing program and cut it out to a jpg. Sounds complicated but isn't

tell me what you think, I could always return to the eye again.

from the Durex Global Sexual wellbeing survey 2007/8 (www.durex.com)